Practice Makes Perfect

While it's not Halloween yet, Kevin was so excited this afternoon about wearing his costume, we decided to go for a practice run. Here's our fierce lion.



He went to the grocery store 'in character' with me and he practiced his roar for all the other customers. It was too cute.

It made me remember how much fun I used to have dressing up as a kid. We used to have a huge trunk in the attic full of old clothes from my grandmother and other sources, and we'd have a blast becoming different characters and play-acting. I wonder where all those old clothes disappeared to. Probably discarded by our parents after being worn to shreds by us.

I'm so glad Kevin inherited the fondness for play-acting and make belief. And he's creative: He already has 2 consistent alter egos: one is 'Boefje', a baby dog who likes to get into trouble, one is 'Mufasa', a fierce lion inspired by the Disney movie: the Lion King, and who's very wise.

Who knows, if he's anything like me, he's likely to have caught the theatre bug and will end up as a stage-actor. I really wouldn't mind. In fact, that would be living my dream life/job.

I've also been play-acting these days though. I have 2 interviews lined up this week, so I've been doing a little rehearsal answering scripts such as 'what are your greatest strenghts', 'what is your management style' and 'how could you contribute to your organization'...blah, not too much fun actually, but a necessary evil.
I don't think the positions at the 2 companies I'm going for are a great fit, but hey, you don't know till you go and find out more about it, right ? and as my husband keep telling me: it's great interview practice. true. I'm definitely not complaining about having interviews, I mean, it has been only 2 weeks since I was let go from the previous job, so it's great in fact to already have this response so early on.....but some selfish part of me wished that I woudn't have the interviews or that they were for were for different jobs/from different companies.... real reason is that I'd hate potentially down the line being faced with a situation of getting a job offer for a job I don't really want to ..... but could I say no to the income when I don't have an immediate fall-back???

Orange, fat and heavy

Nope, not a new Garfield movie.. but time for Halloween prep.

After driving to 3 different pumpkin places, we finally found one to all our liking. The selection had been thinned out a bit already due to our late start, but I totally admit we were being very picky too - not wanting to go with a thin, crooked or damaged specimen.



I decided to experiment with a new carving design this year so Kevin could participate...So yes, those are his hands outlined on the pumpkin. He actually had more fun playing with the scooped-out pumpkin seeds than actually carving anything himself, but that didn't deter him from thinking it was cool (how could anything slimy, messy be otherwise?). The highlight was lighting the matches and putting the tea-light candles in the pumpkin. Not sure why, but it seems we are all little pyromaniacs at heart.

Like many people, I like the fall/winter season here. In Belgium, I usually preferred spring and summer, but here the summer humidity isn't my cup of tea. I much prefer the balmy autumn/winter days. Even when it's grey and rainy outside, it feels warm and seasonal inside, the perfect time for hot chocolates, pannekoeken and gluhwine (yesterday's lunch).

On that note, yesterday evening, we attended a rallying party for the NC democrats. Eventhough I can't vote here (I'm only a green card holder, not a citizen), I am very eager to see a change of leadership in this country, and with the November 7 elections coming up, the party can use the help. It's the first time ever I have gotten involved in politics...but I feel things are so off-course people have to speak up and step up...tells you something about how far it's gotten. Previously, I was always very ambivalent about politics. I had an opinion, but wouldn't take any action, thinking that it wouldn't make much of a difference or wasn't needed. I don't now. If you can vote in the upcoming elections, please do. I will make a difference.

Outplacement

It's been a very interesting week. I have been incredibly busy, and incredibly driven, actually much more so than before I lost my job, and contrary to what I'd expected.

The company has set me up with an outplacement service. You know, the type that helps you out with resume development, interviewing strategies, etc. Needless to say, as I'm typically not a touchy-feely person, I was very sceptical. I figured, I already had a resume and my media-training would go a long way towards knowing how to respond in interviews. I thought I'd pick up some tips, but that'd be pretty much it.

While I was partially right (my resume was in decent shape:-), I still have learned a ton, and they've opened my eyes to a different way of approaching the next position. The thinking's based on 2 main ideas:

1) create a self-marketing plan. Aproach this as the chance and time to really evaluate what the right position and industry is for you, and then develop an actual pro-active marketing plan towards those roles. Using research tools, Dun& Bradstreet databases, bridge contacts, etc. As a marketer, I love this idea: to identify your target audience and then develop a plan towards them using multiple channels. It creates focus and there's a clear goal. The outplacement agency showed data that ~ 40% of jobs are actually created for people, rather than exist to start with, which is very motivating, and helps to avoid the 'just apply towards classified ads' syndrom.

2) network, network, network...as 70% of jobs are found through networking rather than traditional channels (classifieds, internet job boards). This is of course something we've heard before, but I always just thought of it as 'going to the people you know in the industry and asking if they know of any positions.' ..which of course, they don't most of the time. The outplacement agency showed a different way of approaching the networking. Basically, you go to all your A-list contacts, and use them to make other contacts that can move you further in the direction towards your goal. Instead of asking if they know of jobs, you'd say something along the lines of 'I don't expect you to have any jobs or know of any jobs, but what are some of the companies I should think of or people I should talk to that can have some further insights and ideas', which is usually a question that people are comfortable with and can answer. Also, it's more effective to do this face-to-face or by phone, rather than by email or letter.

So, I've been busy in developing that self-marketing plan and calling my first round of contacts. It's easy that way to get talking, and talking and talking...which is actually a really fun way to do a jobsearch, much more fun (and productive) than spending hours on end scouring internet job boards (of course, I do some of that too). And it restores faith in humanity. most people truly want to help you out and are happy to do a joint brainstroming, and usually as part of the conversation, there are things that bubble up that help them too.

With all that, I've been in a much better mood than I thought I'd be at this point . There are still times, now and then, that I get a pit panicky and start thinking financials, but that usually doesn't last too long. Not much you can do except move forward, right?

Another funny thing from the outplacement service: apparently the 'emotional stages' after job loss are the same as the emotional stages after a death (coined by Kubler-Ross): denial - resistance - exploration and commitment. Funky. As the exploration phase is categorized by high enery - that must be where I'm at.

Enjoying city parks

After the blues of the last 2 days, the crips autumn weather was perfect today for a little outdoor outing.



In Cary, the Koka booth amphitheatre hosted the Indian Diwali festival, an all-day celebration of Indian culture with music, dances, food, drinks, merchandise and kids activities. It was the perfect entertainment for us and Kevin, not just because I love Indian (and Thai) food, but also because the scenery and multi-cultural event seemed the perfect antidote to the polital right-wing moral high-ground stuff you hear so often on the airways these days and which gives me the chills. Growing up in a pretty liberal country, I'm a fervent believer in the 'live and let live' motto.


It was the second time in a couple of weeks we went to the Koka booth amphitheatre. The previous time was for Hopefest, a musical fundraiser for Aids research, featuring Aimee Mann and the Indigo Girls. This is something this area can be proud of: the city parks and family amenities are excellent. There are playgrounds, parks, lakes, picnic areas, museums, etc. which are well-maintained and mostly free. When the weather is good - which it usually is in autumn and spring - it makes it easy to find places to go to with a family. It's not something you'd want to do all the time - lest you want to feel like the waltons, but it makes for a nice change of pace now and then.



Kevin discovered today he loves Indian 'mango lassi' drinks (mango pulp, yoghurt, milk & sugar), but prefers ice-cream over samosas. He also preferred the ducks in the lake over the indian dances - though the shiny rhinestones on the dresses did meet with his approval. He's funny.
All in all, it was a nearly perfect day, and allowed me to forget for a bit that I just lost my job....or actually, forget isn't the right word...it seemed less importance. In the grand scheme of things, eventhough we often let ourselves be defined by what we do at work, when all's said and done, family and friends are so much more meaningful.

A downside to living in the US

is that from one day to the next, you can be out of a job...as I just found out this week. Forget about the 3 months or 6 months notice as is usual in Europe, the union-protection or seniority rules... businesses here have the prerogative that when things get though, they can let go of people immediately to improve their balance sheets. No matter how good the people, their performance, or credentials. Of course, employees can do the same thing, but right now, I'd rather trade that benefit in.

I was headhunted 7 months ago by a late-stage tech start-up...and then last Thursday, they had a swift round of lay-offs and I was one of the casualties, as were many others, including the VP of sales, head of engineering, head of OEM sales, head of a media account, a product marketing manager and many others. Still, knowing you're not the only one doesn't lighten the blow that much. I still felt angry, disappointed and cheated....if their financials and forecasting were so unstable, they should never have gone on this massive people hiring binge, and then let them go within the same year. That feels like playing with people, and that doesn't feel fun. I guess it's like a good friend said: it's typical of entrepreneurs, they forecast for what they hope for, rather then for reality. I expected more from a company named in Fortune magazine as one of the '9 tech IPOs worth waiting for'.

You can probably tell, there's a bit of bitterness and sadness in my tone...it'll temper in a little while. I'm over the worst. Nothing a good cry and a little time can't fix. But, in the meantime, I am actively looking for my next job.
As I am at this crossroads, I'd ideally like to use this opportunity to relocate back to Belgium, or nearby in Europe, to be closer to my family, but if push comes to shove, I may have to take something here in the short term to make ends meet. So, if you know of any good positions for a results-driven, seasoned marketing director with american and european experience in high-tech and FMCG, of if you have contacts who know people who might need a marketer with a proven track record in brand stategy, campaign management, public relations and strategic marketing, I'd love to make my resume available and look into opportunities.

comfort food

After all the excitement on Friday, it turned out to be a pretty dreary, drizzly, grey weekend, which is unusual for this area. One of the (few) things I really like about this area is the normally sunny weather, the bright skies. Contrary to Belgium, the fall and winter here are usually filled with blue skies, albeit equally cold often. And it is true that sunlight helps with your disposition, at least for me. 't was not to be this weekend though.

But we made the most of it. And cold, gloomy weather is perfect for baking, so Kevin and I set out to bake a cake. From scratch of course. He (and I) loved it. It takes three times as long to bake a cake with a 2 year old, but it's well worth it. The simplest things like melting butter, separating egg whites from egg yolks, beating egg whites and weighing flour and sugar all become an opportunity for exploration and adventure, and put a huge smile on his face. And it's truly remarkable how good cake batter tastes when you eat it with your fingers :-).

Ever since we made the cake yesterday afternoon, Kevin's been making pretend cake for his dolls, his cars and his dad...too funny. I've also noticed that the words of the cake ingredients (bloem, suiker, boter...) and kitchen utensils (weegschaal, mixer, bakvorm...) are ones he now consistently uses Dutch for, instead of English....maybe that's the trick to speed up his Dutch language development..do it while cooking...I could think of worse things :-)

To evacuate or not to evacuate

that was the question today.

Late last night a huge chemical fire erupted in a plant 1.5 miles from where we live and threw up a big gas plume, resulting in a midnight evacuation of all residents within a 1 mile radius - about 17,000 people - with the potential for more evacuations depending on how the winds spread the gas cloud around....

Waking up to that news didn't quite make for a regular day. .. all area schools were closed, roads blocked and non-evacuated neighborhoods were asked to stay indoors with windows and doors shut and air-conditioning turned off, and to wait for more news.

Fortunately the winds stayed stable and a rain system helped contain the fire and chemicals (though it did spread to a surrounding plant causing several petroleum silos to explode - also not a fun thing to hear closeby)...and although the fire is not yet extinguished, it doesn't look like there's any threat of evaucation anymore and that the risk for chemical exposure has subsided.

It does cause one to ponder when something like that happens. On the one hand, it shows how vulnerable and uninformed we are. I (and most of the Apex residents) had no idea there was a chemical plant closeby, and - this is the interesting bit - that the plant had been penalized already back in March for not properly storing its chemicals creating a potential hazard. It also did not have a good inventory of on-site chemicals, causing a delay for the hazmat teams to combat the chemical fire.
On the other hand, I was impressed by how fast and efficient the authorities responded to the situation. In less than an hour, they had assessed the situation, initiated a reverse-911 call (where neighborhoods and cells phones in the area are automatically called with the news) , started evacuating the surrounding neighborhoods, set up shelters, got the hamat teams on-site and had the large scale medical responder unit mobilized. I've no doubt that it's due to this quick response that there have been so few casualties. Only a dozen firemen and police and some of the lcoals -the first on the scene without protective gear -had to be taken to the hospital due to chemical exposure.

It also shows that it doesn't take a lot for a catastrophe. A few chemical vats left unattended, or a couple of careless plant employees cutting a few safety steps...they don't know yet what exactly started the fire, and maybe they never will, but there are many of these types of plants and factories around, in many dense neighborhoods...not a very reassuring thought.

One unexpected positive part of the day were the calls from friends and colleagues.
We got many calls this morning as people became aware of the news and knew we lived in Apex. All were worried about us and volunteered their homes in case we were evacuated. A big thank you to all of you. It does feel good to know that people care and that -whatever happens -friendship exceeds all else. And on that corny note I will close. Till later- hopefully without catastrophic fires next time.